For so many of us, 2020 was one of the hardest, and most challenging years we've ever had. For way too many, it was Covid-19. For others, it was depression. For me, it was my diagnosis of an autoimmune disease.
My story starts in the summer of 2020, when my husband and I decided to start trying to have a baby. We were happily living in San Francisco, enjoying thriving careers in tech.
We knew we'd never be truly "ready" to become parents, but after prioritizing our professional advancement for the last decade, it was time to grow our family. Seemingly overnight, my focus shifted; whereas in the past I had dedicated 100% of my time and energy to my career, now I had a new goal to devote my attention to as well: getting pregnant.
I was incredibly excited to become a mom. Of course, I'd heard that some women have trouble with fertility, but I assumed that I would have nothing to worry about. At 33, I was still in my peak reproductive years.
Up until that point, I was the picture of good health. I was tall and thin, active, and strong — I’d never even broken a bone! I thought I was doing everything I was "supposed" to be doing to live a healthy lifestyle: eating weekday vegetarian, practicing yoga, and meditating.
After we decided to start trying to have a baby, my first step was going off the birth control pill. This is when I got a big wake up call - my period didn't come back. Knowing that I couldn't get pregnant without it, I started to worry that something might be wrong, so I went to see my primary care doctor.
Panic
After some bloodwork, my doctor had alarming news; my lab tests came back showing an under-active thyroid ("subclinical hypothyroidism").
I was shocked. It was scary to learn that there was something “wrong” with me. I didn't even know what the thyroid was, much less why or how it could be contributing to my emerging fertility challenges. How did my thyroid get out of control? Would I ever be able to have a baby? What could I do to "fix" things?
Over the next few weeks, I saw several specialists, starting with an endocrinologist (which treats hormonal conditions that impact the thyroid) who couldn't give me any straight answers. My gynecologist only added to the confusion by determining another diagnosis: Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), a hormonal disorder common in women that can lead to missed periods and impact your chances of getting pregnant.
It wasn't clear whether the hypothyroidism or PCOS was the real problem. I was told that for women with PCOS, periods typically don't come back on their own and I should consider fertility treatment options ranging from drugs to stimulate ovulation to more invasive procedures like IVF.
I was devastated and couldn't accept the doctor’s assessment that I wouldn’t be able to conceive naturally. I’d assumed getting pregnant would happen quickly and easily, just as it had for many of my friends. I wanted another option besides IVF, which I knew could take months with no guarantee of success.
Then there was a ray of hope when I least expected it.
Diagnosis
By chance, I shared my fertility struggles with a friend, and she connected me with a woman who'd been diagnosed with similar conditions. We discussed her fertility journey, and she strongly recommended I consider functional medicine, an emerging discipline within Western medicine. She explained that traditional medicine often treats symptoms, whereas functional medicine looks for root causes.
Eager to take action, I found someone through the Institute for Functional Medicine website and made an appointment right away with my new functional medicine doctor, Clare.
Using functional medicine principles including several new tests, we discovered that my initial thyroid diagnosis was not fully accurate. While I do have hypothyroidism, I also have an autoimmune disease called Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, which disrupts crucial hormone production in the thyroid and likely contributes to problems getting pregnant.
The symptoms of Hashimoto’s were eerily familiar: fatigue, increased sensitivity to cold, a puffy face, hair loss, skin issues, digestive problems, irregular menstrual cycles, and memory lapses. Like many who suffer from an autoimmune disease, I had experienced these symptoms intermittently for years but didn’t know until now that they were connected.
While learning I had a chronic disease was terrifying, it did give me some comfort to know what was actually happening with me. And, getting to an accurate diagnosis was the first step towards taking action.
Many of the issues contributing to my autoimmune disease were related to gut health. Clare's recommended treatment plan was clear-cut but intimidating; in addition to personalized supplementation and other diet changes, I'd need to stop eating gluten, dairy, caffeine, alcohol, and sugar, which sounded impossible. I’d also have to eliminate toxins and stress from my life.
Even worse, my healing process would likely take at least 3 to 6 months, which seemed like a lifetime. I wanted to get pregnant yesterday.
Initially I was unsure if the sacrifice would be worth it, but having a plan for how to address my health challenges holistically helped me feel much more in control of my path to recovery. Ultimately, I decided to take a chance and go for it. If it worked, it'd be worth it.
Healing
Over the next few months, I devoured dozens of books, articles, and podcasts to dive deeper into the science behind my new illness. It turns out that autoimmune diseases are fairly common, representing the third most common cause of chronic illness in the US, and they affect women twice as often as men.
Through my investigation, I learned that autoimmune conditions are triggered by a combination of genetic predisposition and environmental factors such as diet, exposure to chemicals, and stress. While genetics can't be changed, many of the environmental factors were in my control, and I'd been oblivious to them. I realized that I’d been eating in a way that was silently hurting my body for most of my life (for years, I ate ice cream every single day).
Thankfully, I also discovered a proven approach to treating, reversing and even preventing autoimmune disease which involved the diet and lifestyle changes I had started implementing (eating an anti-inflammatory diet, reducing toxic load, and prioritizing mental health). I went all in on the new protocol, at one point taking over 40 supplements each day.
As I started making these radical changes, I saw encouraging progress. Against all odds, my period did come back on its own (aided by a drug called progesterone), my symptoms improved (better digestion, clearer skin, and more energy), and my thyroid test results started moving in the right direction. Only a few months later, I was in the best shape of my life, and friends remarked that I was “glowing”.
Slowly, I started to shift my focus from getting pregnant to living a healthy and holistic life. I began to accept that it might take years to get pregnant naturally and slowly came to peace with that reality. I was grateful that I had prioritized my health, no matter the cost.
Then, five months into my new health regimen and seemingly out of the blue, I got pregnant naturally!
I was amazed, and my husband couldn't believe it - he encouraged me to take five pregnancy tests to confirm the good news. It was incredibly rewarding to know that my hard work and sacrifices had been worth it. I was proud of myself for not accepting the initial answers from my doctors and instead seeking out an alternative path.
Luckily, we made it through the nerve-wracking early months of pregnancy and are now expecting a baby girl in early January.
Learnings
My diagnosis was completely unexpected, and the experience forced me to rethink the definition of health. Despite the challenges along the way, I feel immense gratitude for the positive changes that I’ve experienced in my life, including physically, mentally and emotionally. I feel compelled to share my learnings with a broader audience and decided to start this newsletter to help other women.
As I've reflected, my experience has taught me a few lessons:
Taking control of my health is up to me. I wish I'd known how to take care of my body and mind holistically before my diagnosis, and I want to encourage others to consider this approach as a preventative measure (especially while trying to get pregnant). I hope that by sharing my story and approach to holistic wellness, I can help you find your path and inspire you to take a holistic approach in your own life.
Women's health issues should be discussed more openly. My initial diagnosis was shocking, but the hardest part about my journey was feeling like I was going through it alone. Opening up about my health issues and getting connected with other women with similar challenges helped me feel supported through the ups and downs. I want to start a conversation around other "taboo" topics such as mental health, fertility and identity.
Access to the right information is key. Society has a big blind spot around the chronic disease epidemic, and the functional approach is not yet accepted by traditional medicine. Despite having access to world class doctors, I wasn't aware of functional medicine until I learned about it through a friend. I've spent hundreds of hours researching the latest science and want to shed light on the diet and lifestyle changes that helped me heal.
Diet is a crucial aspect of the functional medicine approach and one that has benefits for nearly everyone. In my next post, I'll dive deeper into my learnings from the elimination diet and the power of optimal nutrition to radically enhance our lives through more energy, better sleep, and enhanced mood.
Namaste,
Tamara
PS - Please share your feedback on this newsletter by leaving a comment or replying to me directly - I read every email and am eager to hear what resonates.